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A well-liked young man is found dead in the city?s reservoir. The police rule it an accident but the victim?s best friend ? a recently paroled thief ? learns the deceased had his greedy fingers in many dangerous pies. With help from friends and family, his investigation draws the attention of local thugs, corrupt cops, and the head of a multi-national, and he soon realizes there is no one he can trust.
What does the protagonist want to do -- need to do -- in light of what he knows and what are the personal stakes for the protagonist in solving the mystery? Consider Chinatown: Hollis Mulray is found dead in an L.A. reservoir, the police initially rule his death an accident.? But that isn't good enoRead more
What does the protagonist want to do — need to do — in light of what he knows and what are the personal stakes for the protagonist in solving the mystery?
Consider Chinatown: Hollis Mulray is found dead in an L.A. reservoir, the police initially rule his death an accident.? But that isn’t good enough for private detective J.J. Gittes.? Why?? Because by then he realizes he’s been played for a fool being hired to snoop on Mulray by someone claiming to be his wife. “LA is a small town…people talk, I don?t want to become a local joke.”.? What is at stake for him in solving the crime is his personal and professional reputation.? He MUST know who set him up — and why.
See lessDavid is found dead in the city?s reservoir and police rule it an accident. While investigating his best friend?s death, street-smart Sam discovers David had fingers in many pies and, as he was in jail at the time, Sam soon realizes he is the only person who didn?t have an opportunity ? or, apparently, a motive ? to kill him.
And then what? ?The logline sets up a situation for a plot, but it ?doesn't seem to ?spell out a?plot . As a result of what Sam discovers , what becomes his objective goal? What must he do about his friend's death? Who opposes him? ?What's at stake? And I suggest reviewing the logic of the premise.Read more
And then what? ?The logline sets up a situation for a plot, but it ?doesn’t seem to ?spell out a?plot .
As a result of what Sam discovers , what becomes his objective goal? What must he do about his friend’s death? Who opposes him? ?What’s at stake?
And I suggest reviewing the logic of the premise. ?If ?the death has been declared an accident,?then, the police wouldn’t be look for murder suspects. ?And if the police aren’t looking for suspects, then Sam having an ironclad alibi is irrelevant — he wouldn’t be a suspect.
Finally, it’s not necessary to name characters in a logline. ?What matters is not the name of the characters — but?their roles,
See lessInvestigating a series of sadistic crimes, a shady Inspector must protect the only survivor and thwart the machination of a sadomasochistic duo to prove his innocence.
Than you Nir, you're right about the reading. Actually, this "troubled" but efficient inspector is known for being a bit?too much fascinated by sadomasochistic games, and suspected to have some practice. When he comes too close to the duo he is investigating about, they compromise him and make him sRead more
Than you Nir, you’re right about the reading.
Actually, this “troubled” but efficient inspector is known for being a bit?too much fascinated by sadomasochistic games, and suspected to have some practice. When he comes too close to the duo he is investigating about, they compromise him and make him suspected of being the author of the next crimes. so everything is about the A story.
Maybe the following logline would be better?
“Investigating a series of sadistic crimes, a shady Inspector must protect the only survivor and thwart the machination of a sadomasochistic duo to prove his innocence.”
It seems like “sleazy” or “shady” or “fishy” sense is too strong, unless the French translation “louche” doesn’t mean exactly the same thing: there is only a doubt about his sex morality. He frequents ?SM world and/as this is his investigating spesialism.? he is suspected to like and maybe pratice “light” SM games, but not to be violent or dangerous.
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