Logliner
Posted: 2015-09-28T20:10:56+10:00 In:

After a peculiar foreigner buys back her freedom from the king of Jericho, a desperate young prostitute tries to free her enslaved family before the fabled city is destroyed by an Israelite army.

After a peculiar foreigner buys back her freedom from the king of Jericho, a desperate young prostitute tries to free her enslaved family before the fabled city is destroyed by an Israelite army.
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    2 Reviews

    1. Logliner

      Better:

      “When a desperate young prostitute’s family is enslaved in Jericho, she must…”

      Also, ‘facing overwhelming odds’ is too generic for a logline. EVERY great story has a main character facing overwhelming odds.

      Be as specific as you can be within the word count.

      I like the ticking clock/racing against time.

      I know this sounds pedantic, but you’ll make a better impression if you close every sentence with a full stop.

      Without it, it feels as if you rushed this logline…

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    2. Logliner

      Thank you Karel,

      After a peculiar?foreigner?buys back her freedom from the king of Jericho, a?desperate young prostitute tries to free her enslaved family before the fabled city is destroyed by an Israelite army.

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