A determined young woman is trained by her psychologically abusive mother for competition in a professional squash tournament. – a path that puts her on a collision course with her younger and more successful sister.

So this is Warrior but on a squash court? Sounds cool! I love squash and it’s massively under appreciated. Cinematically speaking, it’s two people in a glass box – claustrophobic, tense and full of action. What’s not to love!

I’d say that, at the moment, this is more of a summary of the action in the film (basically just act II). For it to be a logline we need the inciting incident and goal so we can see where the story began and where it’s going. ?Check out the “Our formula” for examples and help with the formatting.

A few random questions to consider:
Why does the mother choose to train one and not the other? What’s the history?
Why squash? I love the idea but I’m curious
I wonder whether it’s a bit clich? to have the parent/coach figure being psychologically abusive. Is there perhaps a new angle to this?
I’m assuming that she’s good at squash already, she must be to enter the pro circuit, so surely she’s had this “collision course” with her sister before. What’s special about this time? Maybe the younger sister ditches the mum as the coach and the mum wants revenge so agrees to train the older, less talented sister for her own personal agenda?

Interested to see where this one goes.