Penpusher
Posted: 2018-11-22T04:08:43+10:00 In:

A psychiatrist on the verge of suicide is haunted by a ghost who shows him that the way to his own happiness is through the suffering of his clients.

A psychiatrist on the verge of suicide is haunted by a ghost who shows him that the way to his own happiness is through the suffering of his clients.

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    4 Reviews

    1. Best Answer
      Singularity

      Please don’t post multiple versions of the same logline. It’s difficult for people to critique one idea when some fairly major elements of the story change. It’s nice to see the evolution of an idea and the associated feedback.

      I think the version without the ghost is stronger (in my opinion). With the ghost it’s almost a bit “God told me to do it”. I think it’s darker and funnier when he’s actually just depressed but ?otherwise mentally sound. I’m thinking of Fargo, where William H. Macy is arranging to have his wife kidnapped. It’s far funnier that he plays it rationally, logically and sanely. The juxtaposition between the nature of the character and the action is where a lot of the humour comes from. ?The audience sympathise with him, they understand him, and that’s what you need too.

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    2. Best Answer
      Singularity

      Agree with mikepedley85.? Using a ghost for the inciting incident? feels like contrived, convenient, a deus ex machina m.o. to kick off the plot.? I think the core premise would work better if the inciting incident arises organically from character rather than contrivance.?

      Which should be easy enough to do . For example, in a depressed mood the shrink unintentionally gives bad advice to a client.? On the next visit, when the client informs him it only made his life more miserable, the shrink experiences schadenfreude and a lifting of his depression.? The depression returns and isn’t lifted until the next time? he finds out his advice unintentionally made matters worse.? This sets the psychological hook in his mind that motivates him to intentionally give bad advice.? ?Comedy and complications ensue.

      fwiw

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    3. Best Answer
      Uberwriter

      I think it needs a reversal. But then again, maybe not.

      A ghost shows a suicidal psychiatrist the happiness in making his patients suffer but…..

      Just a thought.

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    4. Best Answer
      Penpusher

      Confusing. Except it’s a film about a sadist which would be just appaling. Except the viewer is a sadist?

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