Penpusher
Posted: 2015-11-08T14:39:45+10:00 In:

An ambitious woman takes over her uncle?s struggling restaurant, determined to bring the business back to life. When the staff that don?t meet Wendy?s standards begin to disappear, the remaining employees start to question just how dedicated to her job their new manager might be. You?d better hope you?re on next week?s roster.

An ambitious woman takes over her uncle?s struggling restaurant, determined to bring the business back to life. When the staff that don?t meet Wendy?s standards begin to disappear, the remaining employees start to question just how dedicated to her job their new manager might be. You?d better hope you?re on next week?s roster.
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    4 Reviews

    1. Best Answer
      Singularity

      It’s not clear in my mind as to what the plot of this story is.? Are employees not just being terminated–fired–they’re being “terminated with extreme prejudice” — killed?

      If that is in fact, the premise of the story, then I presume the “ambitious woman” is the culprit, or at least the suspected culprit, ergo, the antagonist. So who is the good guy or gal — the? protagonist?? Who must solve the mystery, stop the murders?

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    2. Best Answer
      Logliner

      My take:

      After Hannibal becomes the soul judge of Celebrity MasterChef,?Clarice? has to cook for life or be eliminated.?? https://www.flickr.com/photos/bovinemagnet/14620439267

      • 0
    3. Best Answer
      Logliner

      What if Wendy was not the killer and she had to figure out who is killing her staff and prove to the police that she’s innocent? Then you would have mystery.

      • 0
    4. Best Answer
      Singularity

      Hey Fliss

      If Wendy is killing innocent people, she becomes a negative character. If there are two other main characters trying to stop the killing, or figure out what is happening to their co workers, they are positive characters.

      The audience will find it hard to empathize with a negative character and easy to empathize with the positive ones. I suspect your plot would also be more interesting with an element of mystery introduced by the fact the main characters don’t know what is actually happening.

      Perhaps best to re draft the logline from the point of view of the character or characters that are trying to stop the killer.

      Hope this helps.

      • 0