Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
MAlexander82Penpusher
Posted: March 26, 20192019-03-26T22:52:47+10:00 2019-03-26T22:52:47+10:00In: Horror

Is this a valid log line? Or is it too vague?

A transplant recipient takes on the characteristics of his doner. From beyond the grave this is his only opportunity to untainted his family name.

  • 0
  • 4 4 Reviews
  • 462 Views
  • 0 Followers
  • 0
Share
  • Facebook

    Post a review
    Cancel reply

    You must login to add an answer.

    Forgot Password?

    To see everything, Sign Up Here

    4 Reviews

    • Voted
    • Oldest
    • Recent
    1. Best Answer
      variable Uberwriter
      2019-03-26T23:17:36+10:00Added an answer on March 26, 2019 at 11:17 pm

      You switch Point of view in your logline. It begins from the recipient’s point of view, then switches to the donor?s view.
      A logline should be told from one point of view, and that should be the lead character.

      Which brings us to the next important question? Who is the lead character? The recipient or the donor?

      I like the premise. If you go with donor as your protagonist, then the only vague information is ‘untainted his family name’. Make sure to clarify the Goal of your Protagonist.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    2. Best Answer
      dpg Singularity
      2019-03-27T00:25:25+10:00Added an answer on March 27, 2019 at 12:25 am

      Great inciting incident

      But I’m unsure about the rest.? ?How will being transmorgified help him “untaint” his past.? What is the taint?? And why MUST he clear his family name NOW?? ?What’s at stake?? What’s does he stand to lose, what’s the worst thing that can happen if he doesn’t clear the taint?

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    3. Best Answer
      dpg Singularity
      2019-03-27T03:51:03+10:00Added an answer on March 27, 2019 at 3:51 am

      Upon 2nd reading, I see that I misconceived the project.

      My SOP is to read a logline? fast and furious.? For which I don’t apologize.? Because that’s the way movie makers will read it.? There’s a 5-10 second window of opportunity to get their attention and for them to get the story line.? If they aren’t interested, if they don’t understand? they just move on.

      I see now that the protagonist of the story is not the recipient but rather the deceased organ donor.? ? I suggest the logline needs to be tweaked to make it clearer.?

      But my other questions still pertain.? Why must he clear a tainted past?? Since he’s “dead”, what does he stand to lose — what more can he lose — if he doesn’t

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    4. Best Answer
      dpg Singularity
      2019-03-27T04:55:08+10:00Added an answer on March 27, 2019 at 4:55 am

      >>>He must untainted his name because he didn?t commit the crimes committed.

      Okay.? And that should be clear in the logline.? The stakes are personal:? it’s more than just the family name; his objective goal is exoneration, to prove his innocence.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp

    Sidebar

    Stats

    • Loglines 7,999
    • Reviews 32,189
    • Best Reviews 629
    • Users 3,715

    screenwriting courses

    Adv 120x600

    aalan

    Explore

    • Signup

    Footer

    © 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
    With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.