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dpgSingularity
Posted: September 24, 20182018-09-24T03:13:31+10:00 2018-09-24T03:13:31+10:00In: Examples

The true story of how a motley group of investors defied conventional wisdom and made billions of dollars in the stock market crash of 2008.

The true story of how a motley group of investors defied conventional wisdom and made billions of dollars in the stock market crash of 2008.
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    1. henb Samurai
      2019-05-31T23:00:36+10:00Added an answer on May 31, 2019 at 11:00 pm

      I would delete ‘The true story’, just because since it’s based on a real event I feel many would assume this. I don’t like the word ‘motley’ because the band ‘Motley Crue’ instantly pops in my head. I would explain in greater detail how they ‘defied coventional wisdom’, and would change ‘2008’ to simply ”08′.

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    2. dpg Singularity
      2019-06-01T00:06:32+10:00Added an answer on June 1, 2019 at 12:06 am

      henb:

      You make a good point about? “The true story of”.? It can go, trimming the logline down to a leaner 21 words.

      The literal definition of the phrase “motley crew” is an apropo description of the investors.? The band Motley Crue came? to my mind when I was writing the logline; I deem that association to be a feature, not a bug –? word play like that can enhance a logline.

      >>I would explain in greater detail

      A logline is not intended to be a plot summary.? ?First and foremost, it’s a marketing tool.? IMHO, it’s more effective for a logline to pitch the sizzle than to describe the steak.

      The steak of “The Big Short” is this:? The investors unconventional strategy was to go short on mortgage backed securities while everyone else was going long.

      And, of course, everyone knows the difference between going short and going long.? And everyone knows what a mortgage backed security is.? No explanation or clarification is needed.

      As if!

      Which is why I? focused on the sizzle.? You wanna to know more details about the steak?? Watch the movie.

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