Logliner
Posted: 2017-05-22T12:03:45+10:00 In:

Two ex-Navy divers fight both dread and fear as they are commissioned by the War Dept. to dive on the ship they served on, the USS Arizona.

Two ex-Navy divers fight both dread and fear as they are commissioned by the War Dept. to dive on the ship they served on, the USS Arizona.
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    3 Reviews

    1. Logliner

      I would probably choose a single diver as your main character to begin with. But also you don’t have a goal yet. You should read the formula page on this site and re write this logline. You need to make sure that you include a goal because at the moment you have a character and an event.

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    2. Logliner

      I’m assuming this is in the past. The diver/s in the present day would be at an advanced age and probably wouldn’t be diving. ?Is there a specific issue they are dealing with during the dive? Maybe they could be looking for something specific on the wreckage. What is it they dread and fear?

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    3. Uberwriter

      The Pearl Harbor– Arizona has been down for a very long time, so the better setting for this would be a few years after the end of WWII.

      What this log fails to mention is why are they diving down there? It’s not that much of a risk to go there at it’s present depth.

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