Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
thedarkhorseSamurai
Posted: November 7, 20192019-11-07T20:43:57+10:00 2019-11-07T20:43:57+10:00In: Family

When a charming con artist settles down with a sweet yet gullible woman, he must spend Christmas with her dysfunctional family – and unexpectedly experiences the concept of family for the first time.

–

  • 0
  • 4 4 Reviews
  • 272 Views
  • 0 Followers
  • 0
Share
  • Facebook

    Post a review
    Cancel reply

    You must login to add an answer.

    Forgot Password?

    To see everything, Sign Up Here

    4 Reviews

    • Voted
    • Oldest
    • Recent
    1. thedarkhorse Samurai
      2019-11-07T20:47:24+10:00Added an answer on November 7, 2019 at 8:47 pm

      I hope the conflict is innate here. Clearly he’ll have to unmask himself. Clearly he falls for the family. Not so clearly he begins as a Scrooge-like figure and softens up.

      Longer version: – why he can’t escape…
      Trapped in a small town because of snow storm, a charming con artist settles down with a sweet, wholesome woman and her family for the holidays – and unexpectedly?finds his first chance to have a real family.

      I think it’s too much to make the sweet wholesome woman a mark. I think it’s likely he’s trapped and she takes him in and they slowly fall for each other. Yet he’s still pretending to be someone else.

      (I think as a con artist, he’s more of a loner. He’s spent his whole life cutting off any emotional ties/attachments, etc. He’s less of a predator and more a Frank Abagnale figure. Came from a broken home. Always running. Yet eventually winds up back in his home town.)

      It’s sentimental – because it’s his old home town. There’s some scars here. Perhaps he finds his old house? Perhaps revisits the place where he first became a con artist or where he was made into one?

      Stakes: he could lose a family he grows to love and who grows to love him.
      Conflict: he’s essentially lying to everyone.

      What do you think?

      I’ll probably need a few hours to shave off some words I think. There’s potentially something here.

      (This is when you tell me it’s already a Hallmark film ha.)

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    2. thedarkhorse Samurai
      2019-11-07T20:52:19+10:00Added an answer on November 7, 2019 at 8:52 pm

      Very long version: (yeah I’m gonna try to get this to under 25 words. Still playing around with it.)

      Trapped in his old home town during a snowstorm, a charming con artist settles down with a sweet yet gullible woman for the holidays, but must spend Christmas with her dysfunctional family – and unexpectedly falls in love with the family.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    3. thedarkhorse Samurai
      2019-11-07T20:55:22+10:00Added an answer on November 7, 2019 at 8:55 pm

      Okay…

      Perhaps this one?

      Trapped in his old hometown during a snowstorm, a charming con artist must spend Christmas with a dysfunctional family – and unexpectedly finds the family he never had.

      (27 words?)

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    4. yqwertz Mentor
      2019-11-08T02:54:29+10:00Added an answer on November 8, 2019 at 2:54 am

      In your last logline, it looks like you gave away the ending, something a logline should never do.

      Beyond that problem, where is the conflict? Since the con artist is the MC, the conflict within the dysfunctional family does not count. The logline needs to tell us what conflict involves the MC. If the MC is simply observing the conflict, then he is not the MC. (In the “Great Gatsby” Carraway narrates the story, but Gatsby is the MC as he drives the major conflict.)

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp

    Sidebar

    Stats

    • Loglines 7,997
    • Reviews 32,189
    • Best Reviews 629
    • Users 3,710

    screenwriting courses

    Adv 120x600

    aalan

    Explore

    • Signup

    Footer

    © 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
    With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.