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  1. Posted: February 24, 2016In: Action

    an abandoned boy will have changed destination after knowing their new parents. After being having a normal life things will change and it is because of these things he will become a super hero.

    davidnobles Logliner
    Added an answer on February 24, 2016 at 8:31 am

    This sounds more so like a concept rather than a premise for a film. What is this character's desire, goal, or want? What is his call to action/inciting incident? Also, when you say "things will change", what are those things? I want to know because it sounds like those things in turn are the reasonRead more

    This sounds more so like a concept rather than a premise for a film.
    What is this character’s desire, goal, or want?
    What is his call to action/inciting incident?

    Also, when you say “things will change”, what are those things?
    I want to know because it sounds like those things in turn are the reason why he becomes a superhero.
    If they were specific, that would make the story more rich and have a more focused direction for the story.
    For instance, Batman’s “things” that changed him and caused his vigilante side was the murder of his parents.
    Also, his fear of bats influenced the reason to face his fear and embrace it by becoming who the superhero version of him would be.
    Hopefully this makes sense!
    Good luck!

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  2. Posted: January 24, 2016In: Student Loglines

    A man had a great live but empty live. Suddenly he felt sick. Knowing its incurable he decide to go out on the secluded beach somewhere in Indonesia. On his way to the beach he met a girl that will change the way his perceive life. At last he was cure due to his heart begin to change and he himself becoming a better man. Thanks to the girl !

    davidnobles Logliner
    Added an answer on January 31, 2016 at 6:04 am

    I'm curious what his want is? It doesn't seem like it is to get better because it seems he's already accepted his fate. Is his desire for a peaceful death? I new environment? Also, how does he perceive life from the beginning? What would be so significant about the girl changing his view if we don'tRead more

    I’m curious what his want is? It doesn’t seem like it is to get better because it seems he’s already accepted his fate. Is his desire for a peaceful death? I new environment? Also, how does he perceive life from the beginning? What would be so significant about the girl changing his view if we don’t know his view from the start? Just some questions.

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