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[EDIT] A sheltered American teen, kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, is groomed first as his protégé, then as his bride — but when she discovers he was her late mother’s secret lover, she uses his methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
Or this: When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, she must use his brutal methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
Or this:
When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, she must use his brutal methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
See less[EDIT] A sheltered American teen, kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, is groomed first as his protégé, then as his bride — but when she discovers he was her late mother’s secret lover, she uses his methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
Hmmm...The protagonist of the story is the girl, so it's important (to me, at least) that she be the focus of the logline. Here's a more simplified version: When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, she turns his brutal methods against him to seize his empire.
Hmmm…The protagonist of the story is the girl, so it’s important (to me, at least) that she be the focus of the logline. Here’s a more simplified version:
When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, she turns his brutal methods against him to seize his empire.
See less[EDIT] A sheltered American teen, kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord, is groomed first as his protégé, then as his bride — but when she discovers he was her late mother’s secret lover, she uses his methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
I greatly appreciate your attention to and insights into this logline! She is not so much timid as naïve -- ie, not fully formed yet, inexperienced, though with an incipient toughness. How’s this: When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord and groomed to be his bride, she discovRead more
I greatly appreciate your attention to and insights into this logline!
She is not so much timid as naïve — ie, not fully formed yet, inexperienced, though with an incipient toughness. How’s this:
When a naive American teen is kidnapped by a Bangkok crime lord and groomed to be his bride, she discovers he was her mother’s secret lover…and uses his ruthless methods to destroy him and seize his empire.
See less