1. Posted: March 21, 2013In:

    A mentally troubled banker from Chicago finds himself hard to go by everyday due to his traumatic past, he manages the people who made him who he is now which leads him into a plot to sabotage there financial lives and turn his without being notice by the bank, the victim and overcoming his own greed.

    Tim Way

    good story but the logline is really 2 sentences because its so long. It sounds like he is the protagonist as he is the one that wants to bring everyone down. Was that done on purpose, or is he bringing down the people that have done something bad to him in the past?

    good story but the logline is really 2 sentences because its so long. It sounds like he is the protagonist as he is the one that wants to bring everyone down. Was that done on purpose, or is he bringing down the people that have done something bad to him in the past?

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  2. Posted: March 21, 2013In:

    When a film excursion in the woods turn deadly, Sally must learn to work with her classmates in order for her to survive the horrifying massacre

    Tim Way

    so why does Sally need to work with her classmates, was she socially awkward/ inept before the excursion? Are there two obstacles that Sally needs to overcome for this movie?

    so why does Sally need to work with her classmates, was she socially awkward/ inept before the excursion? Are there two obstacles that Sally needs to overcome for this movie?

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  3. Posted: March 21, 2013In:

    From professional football player to professional coach he leads the top team to victory and breaks multimillion dollar contracts a long the way.

    Tim Way

    what is the goal of the story? is it to lead the team to victory? it isn't clear what the stakes that the coach will face

    what is the goal of the story? is it to lead the team to victory? it isn’t clear what the stakes that the coach will face

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