Reset your life
There is a company that can reset your life. If you don't feel like you have succeed in life you can just reset your life.
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Flip the two sentences. People who feel they never achieved success can aquire the service of a company that resets their life.
You’ve used the word ‘life’ way too many times. In two sentences its been used three times and also in the title. Change them as it reads oddly. It also doesn’t tell a story and more like an advertisement for a company. Need to know a protagonist and why they have decided to use this company and what will happen to them. So far it gives us very little.
This is a premise, not a logline. What’s the story? Who is it about?
This leaves a lot to the imagination, but leaves too much to the imagination! Who? What? When? Where?
What Willie says. I have no idea what your story is about, other than there’s a company which can “reset” lives, whatever that means. You’re also missing the genre – is this a comedy, drama, romance, action, thriller?
You need to give us:
1. protagonist
2. antagonist
3. goal/stakes
4. hook
5. irony (optional but recommended)
Give us at least 1-4 and maybe we can start helping you workshop it.
I immediately thought of two stories: Eternal Sunshine and Groundhog Day. Include enough information to distinguish your story from the others that it might slightly resemble.
To me this is, in essence, just a variation of Adam Sandler’s “Click”. Granted that the surface details are not the same. But there’s nothing to suggest that the underlying tone and situational gags will be much different. The company angle is not enough of a difference to captivate the reader. That said, there is scope for this kind of film to have some interesting – even philosophical – themes that could be explored. Such as “be careful what you wish for” or some message along the lines that being able to constantly reset your life is not real or genuine living. What the logline really needs is to flesh out who is contemplating reseting their lives and hint at what unexpected consequences their ‘resets’ will trigger.
I would further suggest that the ‘resetting’ should not done by some company. Instead, it should be as a result of some exclusive process (probably supernatural). If, in principle, anyone can just purchase a ‘reset’ then that would make for a messy and chaotic world with a film plot that would be difficult to manage and make taut.
Steven Fernandez (Judge).
That’s not a logline. It’s the first part – the setup. Now you need to tell us the protagonist, and why he/she wants to use this service. Plus why they can’t, or if they do, what other problems that creates.
Paul Clarke (judge).
Since a lot of you are telling me you need more story, here it goes: The protagonist is a male (47). He is going through a mid-life crisis and nothing seems to go right for him. He is a loner, hated by his boss, He is single and spends most of his time playing videogames to escape from his depressing life.
He starts wondering what is the meaning of his life (not life in general) and concludes that he has no purpose in life, this only depresses him more. He comes to the conclusion that he will commit suicide, but instead he somehow gets contacted by agency that claims to have invented a “reset-button for life” and you can only use it once.
The antagonist is also the protagonist. In the new life he finds a friend with similiar interests. They create a videogame that becomes a great success. He and his friend creates a company. When he becomes a boss in his new life, he changes. He becomes so obsessed with his new life that he forgets how it was like to be a nobody. He treats his employees badly. He lets the greed take over and slowly pushes his friend away and cheats him out of the company.
(i know the logline was a little short, but I wrote it right after i woke up. So i wouldn’t forget it)
To me it sounds like a public version of The Adjustment Bureau. That’s not to say it wouldn’t work but, as has been said before, the logline isn’t giving us much beyond the idea. “On deciding to reset his life, an under-achieving patent office worker discovers the mysterious Reset Company who, in exchange for his sense of sartorial elegance, allow Albert to develop the Theory of Relativity thus propelling him onto the World stage”. I’m messing obviously, but the gist is there.
The logline has promise and a worthy premise – but it needs fleshing out. Who is your protagonist? What’s at stake? Why will we care? So many questions – and yes, so little time to address them in a logline. But crack the challenges of writing this and you could be on your way to penning a blockbuster the whole world will want to see.