Penpusher
Posted: 2019-06-21T10:13:01+10:00 In:

Rumours of the special school closure looming, fifteen year old student Toni must? decide and risk everything she knows and believes to feel she finally belongs in her world.

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    4 Reviews

    1. Singularity

      What exactly is the lead character’s goal?

      Is there a ‘bad guy’?

      Is the closure just a ‘rumor’ or is the school going to close unless the lead does something?

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    2. Singularity

      As Richiev asked.

      And special school for what?? What is the special need/handicap/character flaw that the protagonist must deal with while striving to achieve her objective goal?

      The logline needs more specifics, more particulars.? If you haven’t already done so, consult the guidelines for writing an industry acceptable logline under “Our Formula”.

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    3. Singularity

      Okay, this probably isn’t quite right, but here is a go based on what you said your story was about. It might still need some changes though, so it is more of an example than a finished logline

      ———————————————————–

      “When her special education institution closes, a student with cerebral palsy fights against her parents and teachers, to be admitted to public school in order to have a normal senior year.”

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    4. Singularity

      Hi Athena,

      Glad you took my advice and posted it here…

      Richiev and DPG both raised similar issues and solutions to what we discussed at the meetup, this should give you some good direction for further development.

       

       

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