Alice Archibald, a former Cambridge Professor, takes on her new job as a high school English teacher, must put up with with arrogant co-workers and idiotic students, as she tries to forget her recently failed marriage without going nuts.

So, basically, the premise is about a teacher dealing with frustrating people all day? Is that really a story you want to dedicate a year’s worth of your life writing?

As a logline, you wouldn’t mention the protag by name unless it’s about a famous person. I’m not aware of Archibald being famous (but maybe she is). “Putting up” with people is hardly compelling. She has to have a real goal, with overwhelming obstacles and serious stakes if she should fail in reaching her goals.

Last but not least, you’ll need a “hook” that separates this story from all others in it’s genre. Oh, speaking about genre, the tone of the logline must clearly demonstrate that genre. Not sure if this is a comedy, a drama, a historical drama, or what, exactly.

If it’s not working as a logline, chances are the story is missing some key elements. The elements of the logline should include protag (hero), antag (bad guy), goal, obstacle, stakes, hook, irony and genre.

Hope that helps a little…

Geno Scala (sharkeatingman), judge.