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We are One with all there is. When the darkness of the Roman Empire grows too strong four people are brought together by those of the light to make the Empire begin to crumble and fall.
Consider the following: I can envision an expanse of the Roman empire, but what brought these four protags together and “those of the light” is not in focus. Check out examples in Formula (link header) to help. When a [CHARACTER], is [confronted by a MAJOR EVENT], s/he must [do the ACTION/GOAL]. or:Read more
Consider the following:
I can envision an expanse of the Roman empire, but what brought these four protags together and “those of the light” is not in focus.
Check out examples in Formula (link header) to help.
When a [CHARACTER], is [confronted by a MAJOR EVENT], s/he must [do the ACTION/GOAL].
or:
A [CHARACTER], must [do the ACTION/GOAL] when [a MAJOR EVENT occurs].
Hope you find this constructive, take care.
See lessWhen thrust into one of his stories, a timid author must overcome writer’s block and rewrite the narrative in order to save his fictional world and its inhabitants.
I like this one, it is clear and I can get a feeling of what the writer is like and what the action and event is. I also get curious, how and why is the author thrust into one of his stories? Does his writing change under this pressure? Who will help him and who will be against him?
I like this one, it is clear and I can get a feeling of what the writer is like and what the action and event is.
See lessI also get curious, how and why is the author thrust into one of his stories? Does his writing change under this pressure? Who will help him and who will be against him?
When the love of his life is kidnapped by pirates because she carries a certain piece of gold, a smith teams up with a renowned pirate to rescue her.
Good start. I feel like "because she carries a certain piece of gold" is not that necessary. Also I would put in some character trait for the smith. For example: "an honorable young smith".
Good start. I feel like “because she carries a certain piece of gold” is not that necessary. Also I would put in some character trait for the smith. For example: “an honorable young smith”.
See less