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  1. Posted: February 2, 2024In: Adventure

    A German teenager craving social acceptance unexpectedly time-travels from 1914 to 1933 and must choose: find belonging in the Hitler Youth or break his daughter out of a prison camp.

    lukige_uk Penpusher
    Added an answer on February 2, 2024 at 6:34 am

    A rewritten logline and elevator pitch. I'd love your feedback - particularly on its clarity and narrative potential.

    A rewritten logline and elevator pitch. I’d love your feedback – particularly on its clarity and narrative potential.

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  2. Posted: December 7, 2023In: Adventure

    Una adolescente prodigio se embarca en una aventura por los basurales de la ciudad para encontrar a su tío que ha sido secuestrado por la Mafia a cargo del manejo de los desechos.

    Odie Samurai
    Added an answer on December 13, 2023 at 6:50 am

    Blame it on Google translator if I mucked this logline up ;) A teenage detective sets out to the Mafia-run garbage dumps in order to rescue her kidnapped beloved uncle. I hope this helps. Keep going!

    Blame it on Google translator if I mucked this logline up 😉

    A teenage detective sets out to the Mafia-run garbage dumps in order to rescue her kidnapped beloved uncle.

    I hope this helps. Keep going!

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  3. Posted: May 21, 2023In: Adventure

    When he is denied admission to any of the college for his low grades, he gets an invitation from a mysterious college which was shut down decades ago.

    Odie Samurai
    Added an answer on May 31, 2023 at 8:29 am

    Interesting setup. What’s the goal? You could start with “When an invitation arrives from a long-defunct college, a [subpar/jilted student] [adventure goal].” Make this yours. Take care.

    Interesting setup. What’s the goal?
    You could start with “When an invitation arrives from a long-defunct college, a [subpar/jilted student] [adventure goal].”

    Make this yours. Take care.

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