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  1. Posted: March 4, 2016In: Adventure

    .

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on March 6, 2016 at 10:19 am

    Think of the inciting incident as the cause for her goal. If she discovers she can alter reality how does this cause her to need to rescue her long-lost father? It doesn't. The inciting incident should shake up the main character's world and force them to take action, so if you want her goal to be tRead more

    Think of the inciting incident as the cause for her goal.

    If she discovers she can alter reality how does this cause her to need to rescue her long-lost father? It doesn’t.

    The inciting incident should shake up the main character’s world and force them to take action, so if you want her goal to be to save the father what event could you devise to motivate her to do so?

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  2. Posted: March 6, 2016In: Adventure

    .

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on March 6, 2016 at 8:00 am

    My first reaction is that?"alter reality"?seems to be ?such a god-like power I don't see how any foe could pose a serious threat to her.? This is a? story with a protagonist and no antagonist, no matter how "otherworldly", who can beat her.The odds are ever in her?favor.? There's nothing to worry abRead more

    My first reaction is that?”alter reality”?seems to be ?such a god-like power I don’t see how any foe could pose a serious threat to her.? This is a? story with a protagonist and no antagonist, no matter how “otherworldly”, who can beat her.

    The odds are ever in her?favor.? There’s nothing to worry about.

    On the other foot, if the “otherworldly foe”? can take her down, than what’s his game winning?move, its super-godly power,??that could defeat her?

    I think the “alter reality” needs to be clarified.? If she can alter reality why can’t she just close her eyes, click her heels 3 times — or however it works –?and make the crooked, obstacle strewn?path to finding her father — for mere mortals like me — a straight and?clear freeway on which she can travel?in the fast lane to her objective goal?

    Also the premises poses a foe who seems out to destroy for no particular reason.? IOW:? what’s the cause-and-effect relationship between her powers and the foe’s motivation to destroy her just because she wants to find her father?

    And then there’s the matter of “product differentiation”.? I did a search at the top of the web page for “monster” and “creature” two terms similar to the description of an “otherworldly foe”.?? I got 60 hits — 60 loglines with?fictional entities competing with your “otherworldly foe” for attention and? financing as a dramatic antagonist.?

    Granted, some of them are multiple versions, polishes?of the same logline premise.? Even so,? what’s your product differentiation? What makes your “otherworldly foe” unique, different from all the others?

    fwiw

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  3. Posted: February 16, 2016In: Adventure

    After a car crash leaves him unable to walk and dying of thirst, an inventor and his physically-disabled cousin must traverse the harsh Australian desert using only her electric wheelchair.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on February 20, 2016 at 9:52 am

    Don't worry about length at this point. 30 words is ideal but not a must, if the story needs a few more words to come across in the logline, then let it be so unless of course a company or contest specify a 25 word limit. Other wise I'd endeavor to say you're still writing the script, if so this isRead more

    Don’t worry about length at this point.

    30 words is ideal but not a must, if the story needs a few more words to come across in the logline, then let it be so unless of course a company or contest specify a 25 word limit.

    Other wise I’d endeavor to say you’re still writing the script, if so this is a structuring tool for you in which case there is no word count limit.

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