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  1. Posted: December 14, 2015In: Comedy

    After a bittersweet divorce, the most successful writer of his time spirals into a depressive writer?s block. He begins his life anew alongside his two new and highly dysfunctional roommates which inadvertently jumpstarts his new comedic book series, Man Chronicles.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on December 20, 2015 at 9:50 am

    The first sentence in this logline describes back-story and can be cut down to: After suffering a depressive writer's block... The problem with this concept is that it lacks a clear line of causality between the actions and events it describes. Divorce then writer's block then new life then new roomRead more

    The first sentence in this logline describes back-story and can be cut down to: After suffering a depressive writer’s block…

    The problem with this concept is that it lacks a clear line of causality between the actions and events it describes. Divorce then writer’s block then new life then new roomates then new book, these do not logically necessitate each other in the order they are written in the logline.? The events and actions in the logline may be clearly connected in the synopsis, but for the logline purposes best to describe only the A plot vital actions. If the main character is a writer, the A plot is about him overcoming his writers block not his divorce (backstory) or his new roomates (allies).

    The other problem is the lack of a clearly defined and visual goal. What is it exactly that he wants?? To write a successful book is not a good enough goal, success is too broad and won’t translate visually to the cinema screenvery well.? Perhaps best to define a deadline by which he has to turn in a manuscript to his publisher or else he loses his contract?

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  2. Posted: December 3, 2015In: Comedy

    After drunkenly trashing his dealer’s car, a 25 year old slacker has to secretly use the only job he has, a shared paper route with his overachieving 14 year old sister to distribute weed until it gets fixed.

    CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
    Added an answer on December 13, 2015 at 9:26 am

    A slacker, not sure it is the right word or paints enough of a picture. ?The sibling rivalry may be great, but is it the aim of the script? If so start with that, "sibling rivalry boils over when..." ?I like the idea of a loser do a paper to sell drugs. "Desperate for money to fix his dealers car aRead more

    A slacker, not sure it is the right word or paints enough of a picture. ?The sibling rivalry may be great, but is it the aim of the script? If so start with that, “sibling rivalry boils over when…” ?I like the idea of a loser do a paper to sell drugs.

    “Desperate for money to fix his dealers car a stoner shares his ( over achiever) sisters paper route as a ruse to sell weed.”

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  3. Posted: December 7, 2015In: Comedy

    A New York-based, coke-addicted DJ who is obsessed with 70s disco sees a mob execution so FBI Witness Protection sticks him in a rural Iowa town.

    Best Answer
    seanamulvihill Logliner
    Added an answer on December 10, 2015 at 6:40 am

    Thank you. ?It is before he has had a chance to testify. A small-time club DJ who is obsessed with 70s disco sees a mob execution, so FBI Witness Protection sticks him in a rural Iowa town while he waits for his chance to testify. ?When he helps a young country songwriter create a smash hit song, thRead more

    Thank you. ?It is before he has had a chance to testify.

    A small-time club DJ who is obsessed with 70s disco sees a mob execution, so FBI Witness Protection sticks him in a rural Iowa town while he waits for his chance to testify. ?When he helps a young country songwriter create a smash hit song, the fame could become deadly for them both…

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