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  1. Posted: November 14, 2019In: Comedy

    A cowardly parking office accidentally locks himself in the trunk of his car on his wedding day, but when the car is stolen with him in it, he must escape and get to the altar before the thieves realise he’s there.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on December 1, 2019 at 10:22 am

    A comedy version of Buried - if done well this could be fun. Comps for you: The Hangover meets Buried.

    A comedy version of Buried – if done well this could be fun.

    Comps for you: The Hangover meets Buried.

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  2. Posted: November 14, 2019In: Comedy

    When two incompetent crews try to rob her bank at the same time, an ambitious bank manager must play one against the other to buy time and save the money.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on November 16, 2019 at 10:17 am

    Great suggestion from DPG. The only thing I can add is that the bank manager seems unrelated to the plot. In other words, if you were to replace her with any other manager the story would stay the same. This means that the plot isn't inherently an extension of her flaw and character. Perhaps it woulRead more

    Great suggestion from DPG.

    The only thing I can add is that the bank manager seems unrelated to the plot. In other words, if you were to replace her with any other manager the story would stay the same. This means that the plot isn’t inherently an extension of her flaw and character. Perhaps it would be better to describe her as a genuinely flawed character and make the premise a result of this flaw.

    What if she was the security guard or head of security at the bank, and it’s her lack of professionalism or laziness that allows the robbers to break-in.

     

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  3. Posted: November 5, 2019In: Comedy

    A rookie Intelligence Officer accidentally risks a global incident, when she tries to replace the Foreign Minister of a hostile middle eastern country with an impostor: his secretly homosexual twin brother.

    thedarkhorse Samurai
    Added an answer on November 6, 2019 at 6:53 pm

    An Intelligence Officer replaces the Foreign Minister of a hostile middle eastern country with... his not-so-secret homosexual twin brother. - I chopped a lot of the padding. don't need the "tries to". I mean - he's gonna do it ha. Cut the imposter. You might need it. We'll see. I'm just playing aroRead more

    An Intelligence Officer replaces the Foreign Minister of a hostile middle eastern country with… his not-so-secret homosexual twin brother.

    – I chopped a lot of the padding. don’t need the “tries to”. I mean – he’s gonna do it ha. Cut the imposter. You might need it. We’ll see. I’m just playing around here.

    – Hmm still feels like “Dave” crossed with a Sacha Baron Cohen film ha.

    – Hopefully, “not-so-secret” suggests he’s very clearly gay but will in hilarious situations think it’s hidden.

    – I agree with Dpg. You might need to push on the stakes.

    – Concept has a fish-out-of-water which is good. I don’t think being gay is enough though. Perhaps he knows nothing about politics? Perhaps he’s a compulsive trouble maker? A drinker? How is this guy gonna make things worse?

    Hmm – how about “his not-so-secret homosexual twin brother – a man with a voracious sexual appetite”.

    or…

    “his black sheep twin brother… a not-so-secret homosexual who loves to party.”

    – Lastly, perhaps you need a “Then”? Then what happens? How does this guy cause trouble and mischief?

    Anyways – play around with it. Experiment.

    Nothing I say is gospel.

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