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when his highschool bully returns, a stuck-in-home-town loser must prove his competence by kicking his ass in the duel he proposed and save his family name
Suggestion:? the inciting incident is the new girl in town whom he falls in love with.? So he has to stand up to the bully -- instead of run away -- if he's going to impress her. "Whatever a man does, he does for his ideal woman." -- George Balanchine fwiw
Suggestion:? the inciting incident is the new girl in town whom he falls in love with.? So he has to stand up to the bully — instead of run away — if he’s going to impress her.
“Whatever a man does, he does for his ideal woman.” — George Balanchine
fwiw
See lessWhen his uncle and Stepfather want a new council building, the council lawyer to impress his Mafia uncle and take over his uncle?s mafia empire , introduces parking fines but he must deal with an irate customer and his computing hacking stepbrother who by interfering with his plans threatens to make him look incompetent.
>>>introduces parking fines but he must dealAs the municipal council lawyer, he can only recommend.? The majority of the council has to approve.And parking fines are small potatoes, pocket change? when compared to the money his uncle must be racking in by the regular rackets.? Even as a comRead more
>>>introduces parking fines but he must deal
As the municipal council lawyer, he can only recommend.? The majority of the council has to approve.
And parking fines are small potatoes, pocket change? when compared to the money his uncle must be racking in by the regular rackets.? Even as a comedy, I fail to see how this is enough to impress his uncle,? tap him as his successor.
And isn’t it an “irate citizen”? rather than “irate customer”?
?
See lessLogline (for 6 part series) An incompetent klutz but competent council lawyer, wants his uncle to name his as the next mafia boss so he can get girls but he needs to show he knows how to make money and can run a business. Logline for pilot When his uncle and Stepfather want a new council building, the council lawyer to impress his Mafia uncle and take over his uncle?s mafia empire , introduces parking fines but must deal with the problems that these cause.
At 80 words, this logline is w-a-y too long . Please review the guidelines under "Our formula".? With loglines, less is more.
At 80 words, this logline is w-a-y too long . Please review the guidelines under “Our formula”.?
With loglines, less is more.
See less