1. Posted: June 9, 2017In:

    Amidst a country-wide epidemic where people are gradually fading away from existence, a downbeat poet struggles to compose an ode to save his fading father, but must deal with his overbearing mother who is hell bent on sending him abroad.

    emvshah Logliner

    Thank you DK for taking the time to comment. I have already completed the first draft of my short story, and to be honest, the story is everything that you mentioned. Your feedback goes a long way to concentrate on?the interesting part.. THANKS!

    Thank you DK for taking the time to comment. I have already completed the first draft of my short story, and to be honest, the story is everything that you mentioned. Your feedback goes a long way to concentrate on?the interesting part..

    THANKS!

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  2. Posted: June 7, 2017In:

    While the country is being swept by an epidemic where the people are gradually fading away from existence, a struggling poet tries to compose an ode to his amnesic father, but must deal with his overbearing mother who is hell bent on sending him abroad to escape from this fate.

    dpg Singularity

    Like Nir Shelter, I can't figure out what the story is really about.The story hook is people gradually fading away because of an epidemic. ?I don't see how writing poetry builds on that story hook or is in any way as interesting. ? Why does it matter whether someone finishes a poem when there are biRead more

    Like Nir Shelter, I can’t figure out what the story is really about.

    The story hook is people gradually fading away because of an epidemic. ?I don’t see how writing poetry builds on that story hook or is in any way as interesting. ? Why does it matter whether someone finishes a poem when there are bigger problems to worry about, like humanity ?dying off?

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  3. Posted: May 18, 2017In:

    An aspiring young actor searches for love, which he so desperately wants, from others but not from within himself.

    MitchW Logliner

    At the moment you don't have a functioning logline. This story is full of an inner journey but there is no external goal or an event that drives the character towards that goal. When an aspiring?young actor takes on a role with a gorgeous actress, he must find a way to get the girl. I don't think whRead more

    At the moment you don’t have a functioning logline. This story is full of an inner journey but there is no external goal or an event that drives the character towards that goal.

    When an aspiring?young actor takes on a role with a gorgeous actress, he must find a way to get the girl.

    I don’t think what I’ve written is the strongest logline ever but I think it works okay. A lot of the information you have put in your logline doesn’t need to be there. You can definitely have all those elements in your script but I think you should leave them out of your logline.

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