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After an ugly break-up, a man tries to put his life together by building a new home only to find out his virtual assistent is possessed by an vengeful spirit.
Love me some horror CucuMucu, think about the following while sharpening this logline. 1. Does this breakup involve an e.g. girlfriend, or does it have more weight like an ugly divorce? The logline will serve better with a big inciting incident. If the breakup is a minor part of the plot, one that yRead more
Love me some horror CucuMucu, think about the following while sharpening this logline.
1. Does this breakup involve an e.g. girlfriend, or does it have more weight like an ugly divorce? The logline will serve better with a big inciting incident. If the breakup is a minor part of the plot, one that you move past quickly and has little or no character reoccurrence later – you could skip right to the possession as your inciting incident.
2. OPINION: It will help to call your protag an “architect” who’s building his “dream SMART home” as an anchor for the virtual assistance + “rebuilding” metaphors.
3. Now that we’re getting closer to a strong inciting incident, focus on your protag and goal, we need to work on your antagonist. Since this is not one of those old haunted house stories you need a unique method of how this vengeful spirit possesses your virtual assistant. This can get cliché quick, be careful as we (audience) has seen it all – surprise us 😊.
4. You can also add stakes or the method of how he will overcome this vengeful spirit.
If you like, please elaborate on my above comments, whom he broke up with, and this vengeful spirit so I or the community can take a crack at this – got to be a reason why this spirit is so pissed right? 😉
Hope this helps, take care
See lessWhen a genetically-enhanced soldier escapes from a Military Black Site in New Mexico, his CIA handler struggles to find a way to apprehend him as the soldier leaves a trail of destruction throughout the United States.
The logline is clear, understandable, and sounds interesting. If you are posting to test the concept, then my opinion is that you are ready to begin writing. If you have written the story, the logline could be touched up. The main protagonist (CIA Handler) is buried. You could cut "from a United StaRead more
The logline is clear, understandable, and sounds interesting.
See lessIf you are posting to test the concept, then my opinion is that you are ready to begin writing.
If you have written the story, the logline could be touched up.
The main protagonist (CIA Handler) is buried.
You could cut “from a United States Black Site in New Mexico.”
Also, this has been done before, what is your spin on the story?
When stranded in her partner’s old ski village on the anniversary of his disappearance, a distraught woman must finally kill the old thing that’s been lurking in the snow.
I'd personally drop the when and reword the star more like, "Stranded on the anniversary of her partner's disappearance in his old ski village..." To me that comes right out the gate with impact, of course this is a personal preference. Did her partner own a ski village or live there or was it a plaRead more
I’d personally drop the when and reword the star more like, “Stranded on the anniversary of her partner’s disappearance in his old ski village…” To me that comes right out the gate with impact, of course this is a personal preference. Did her partner own a ski village or live there or was it a place he visited? The wording for that seems a tad off to me, maybe I’m not versed enough in skiing to understand that. Still, I would be interested to know what has been lurking in the snow.
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