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  1. Posted: September 20, 2019In: Horror

    After starting a commune in the aftermath of Woodstock, a group of hippies has to resort to stealing from a hermit chicken farmer. All goes well until they kill his favorite hen… Now it?s his time to kill.

    giannisggeorgiou Samurai
    Added an answer on September 29, 2019 at 11:04 pm

    "In Woodstock's aftermath, after stealing a chicken from an old hermit's farm, a hippy and her friends must survive his chainsaw rampage. Or whatever his rampage looks like. I also suggest you give a clue of the protagonist's flaw, so that you hint some inner journey?although in a horror premise thaRead more

    “In Woodstock’s aftermath, after stealing a chicken from an old hermit’s farm, a hippy and her friends must survive his chainsaw rampage.

    Or whatever his rampage looks like.

    I also suggest you give a clue of the protagonist’s flaw, so that you hint some inner journey?although in a horror premise that may be too much.

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  2. Posted: September 29, 2019In: Horror

    When a savage killer hunts a Chicago neighborhood, a seasoned detective must stop him; but the cop quickly becomes the prey, left with his rookie partner as the only one he can trust.

    giannisggeorgiou Samurai
    Added an answer on September 29, 2019 at 9:43 pm

    The logline practically is: "When a savage killer stalks a Chicago neighborhood, a seasoned but [flawed] detective must stop him, with the help of his [complimentary flawed] rookie partner." I keep the rookie partner element because it's the only thing that differentiates this logline from any otherRead more

    The logline practically is:

    “When a savage killer stalks a Chicago neighborhood, a seasoned but [flawed] detective must stop him, with the help of his [complimentary flawed] rookie partner.”

    I keep the rookie partner element because it’s the only thing that differentiates this logline from any other police thriller ever made. Find the flaws.

    Can you think of anyhing that makes the story special? Perhaps the killer’s MO? Perhaps the protagonists’ flaws? Or the dynamic between them?

    (For example, in “Seven” the MO related to the 7 deadly sins was the hook that made the story unique.)

    The following is part of the genre convention, so I wouldn’t bother with it:

    “… the cop quickly becomes the prey, left with his rookie partner as the only one he can trust.”

    The cop in police thrillers always becomes the killer’s target, in Act Three. So nothing special here.

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  3. Posted: September 8, 2019In: Horror

    A family of four moves into a house in a small town only to find out the house takes people when it takes one of the children. the family has to do all they can to save their child.

    mrliteral Samurai
    Added an answer on September 9, 2019 at 3:06 am

    A family of four may be main characters but they're not a protagonist; single someone out and define them in some way. Make it clear what happens, what the stakes are, what has to be done, and do it in one sentence.

    A family of four may be main characters but they’re not a protagonist; single someone out and define them in some way. Make it clear what happens, what the stakes are, what has to be done, and do it in one sentence.

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