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When a crew of mismatched oilfield workers stay late to finish a job in the middle of nowhere, they are attacked by bloodthirsty monsters. They’ll have to band together to fight through blood guts, and teeth if they want to live to see another sunrise.
Okay, with such a remote location, the state isn't necessary.While it still doesn't intrigue me, see if this helps to clarify the next attempt: After bloodsucking creatures attack an oilfield that is hours from the nearest town, the first female (worker or driller or x) must...The respect part isn'tRead more
Okay, with such a remote location, the state isn’t necessary.
While it still doesn’t intrigue me, see if this helps to clarify the next attempt: After bloodsucking creatures attack an oilfield that is hours from the nearest town, the first female (worker or driller or x) must…
The respect part isn’t needed in the logline and would be implied by clarifying that she’s the first woman. First day is now a secondary detail.
Considering the angle that she’s the first woman, it’s natural that what she must do is save the men…in a specific way, as was mentioned. And yet, this ‘first woman’ angle feels less-than-natural within ‘vampires in oilfield.’ Consider being direct and exploring the oil sin or consider another setting or another protag.
What’s the main thing motivating you to write this? The idea can evolve in different ways if one focuses on ‘oilfield horror,’ or ‘old-school vampires’ or ‘first woman,’ While each is clear and has potential, and the first and third can work together, all three together feels fuzzy.
See lessIn a post-apocalyptic world, a family must remain silent to hide from monsters with ultra-sensitive hearing.
Karel:The logline I posted is the marketing version? featuring the story hook.? I have come to believe that to be the most important element in a spec script.And based upon my understanding? of how the film came to be,? that is how the project got going.? The star/director,. John Krasinski, got invoRead more
Karel:
The logline I posted is the marketing version? featuring the story hook.? I have come to believe that to be the most important element in a spec script.
And based upon my understanding? of how the film came to be,? that is how the project got going.? The star/director,. John Krasinski, got involved on the basis of the hook .? But he was not satisfied with the spec script.? So he undertook a number of rewrites before arriving at the version that was shot. Hence, why he got the lead writing credit.
So I see this as an instance of a movie project that got going? more on the strength of the story hook than on the strength of the? plot of the original spec script.
As for a development version of the logline that sets out the inciting incident for the shooting script — good question!
The film opens in media res, sort of,? the monsters are already there.? And they kill a son.? Which creates a subjective problem, the daughter’s sense of guilt for her brother’s death and her relationship with her father.? And embedded in that is a theme?
Whatever, a development logline is supposed to focus one the objective problem and goal, not the subjective.
So, the story jumps forward to more than a year later.? The wife is pregnant, has almost comes to term.? Which raises the objective dramatic problem:? infants cry.? It could take years to train the child to remain silent.? Which raises the dramatic question: will she be able to safely deliver and raise the baby in such a hostile environment?
I throw the question back to you:? what do you think to be the inciting incident of the plot of the film that got made?
See lessDisillusioned to the world around him following the rejection from his crush, an introverted youth finds solace in an online community; however, as the site becomes an echo chamber for hateful rhetoric, his spiritual ennui morphs into a violent ideology.
This sounds more like a good setup (or even first half) to a dramatic or dark coming of age tale, not a horror story. If so, consider starting the next attempt by glossing over most of this one. For example, "After being influenced with a hateful ideology, a disillusioned fifteen year-old..." If it'Read more
This sounds more like a good setup (or even first half) to a dramatic or dark coming of age tale, not a horror story. If so, consider starting the next attempt by glossing over most of this one. For example, “After being influenced with a hateful ideology, a disillusioned fifteen year-old…”
If it’s character-driven, then it may be more about what he deals with than an objective he actively seeks to achieve. Like, how his family and friends react to the change in him.
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