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An agoraphobic writer must revisit her dark past, and battle a menacing presence, in order to survive the night, and reach the most important deadline of her life.
I like this. Intriguing. But, I have to agree with Sadie. I feel the menacing presence needs to be something more concrete. If the menacing presence is something more psychological that is hard to define,? (and I well understand the logline struggle in this scenario), I'd try and pick the most tangiRead more
I like this. Intriguing.
But, I have to agree with Sadie. I feel the menacing presence needs to be something more concrete.
If the menacing presence is something more psychological that is hard to define,? (and I well understand the logline struggle in this scenario), I’d try and pick the most tangible and vivid element.
See lessWhen her mother dies under mysterious circumstances, a resourceful young school teacher must step into her mother’s job at the secluded Winston School for Children and try to uncover the reason behind her mother’s death.
Great advice Nir. The usage of the word "Mother" 3 times in a single sentence could be avoided too. After her mother's mysterious death, a daughter takes a job in a secluded school for children hoping to solve the mystery behind the tragedy.
Great advice Nir. The usage of the word “Mother” 3 times in a single sentence could be avoided too.
After her mother’s mysterious death, a daughter takes a job in a secluded school for children hoping to solve the mystery behind the tragedy.
See lessAfter finding a talisman in England’s most haunted ruin, three young boys awaken the ancient guardian of Berkshire Castle, which is hellbent on adding skulls to its collection.
What Richiev and Foxtrot25 said. ?What becomes the objective goal as a result of the situation created by the inciting incident? ?What must the young boys do -- or else?
What Richiev and Foxtrot25 said. ?What becomes the objective goal as a result of the situation created by the inciting incident? ?What must the young boys do — or else?
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