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A dog makes his way back home to his owner after they’re separated in a bombing during the Korean War.
Dig it! A Homeward Bound premise set in the Korean War. To pull me in as a reader: Any special characteristics concerning the dog? Anything unique to the landscape of the Korean War that the dog must cross to up the stakes? Take care.
Dig it! A Homeward Bound premise set in the Korean War.
To pull me in as a reader:
Any special characteristics concerning the dog?
Anything unique to the landscape of the Korean War that the dog must cross to up the stakes?
Take care.
See lessAs police uncover a far-right group behind a series of grisly murders sweeping Japan, a police officer and former ultra nationalist seeking redemption must go undercover to prevent his younger brother from going down the same wrong path.
There’s something to this, consider the following: To keep from following two goals (police – group behind bars | far-right guy – rescue mission), two unconnected protags but one brother, I produced this. Example: “A former ultra-nationalist must rejoin a far-right group behind a series of grisly muRead more
There’s something to this, consider the following:
To keep from following two goals (police – group behind bars | far-right guy – rescue mission), two unconnected protags but one brother, I produced this.
Example:
“A former ultra-nationalist must rejoin a far-right group behind a series of grisly murders sweeping Japan in order to rescue his wayward younger brother”
You can up the stakes by adding a “before” element at the end e.g., before the police catch up to him.
Hope you find this constructive, make this yours, keep going!
See lessA grieving mothers accidental killing of a crime boss collides with her estranged fathers underworld debts, reunited they must escape a police hunt across country in an effort to prove their innocence.
"grieving mother" = protagonist "accidental killing of a crime boss" = inciting incident "must escape a police hunt across country in an effort to prove their innocence" = main character goal If this were my logline, I'd ask myself, Why set the scene with a grieving mother? A way to establish strongRead more
“grieving mother” = protagonist
“accidental killing of a crime boss” = inciting incident
“must escape a police hunt across country in an effort to prove their innocence” = main character goal
If this were my logline, I’d ask myself, Why set the scene with a grieving mother? A way to establish strong audience pity, perhaps, but what is she grieving over? As reader, the only clue is maybe she is grieving over her estranged father’s underworld debts, but then, maybe not!
The main villain in this story is the ‘Police’. A villain can be just as important as the hero in a story, so who is this police person? Male/female, old/young? Consider a little character depth to the bad guy, and see what happens!
Take for example the film The Fugitive (1993). Here we have an innocent character, who accidently enters a murder scene of his wife, only to become the lead suspect of a thrilling police chase. Clearly the police are the ‘bad guys’, because they are mistaken about our poor Fugitive and the crime. But Tommy Lee Jones plays such a good ‘bad guy’, that we sit seat edged, wanting to know who will win.
Crime boss, accidental killing, estranged fathers, and underworld debts, may all be too many ingredients. That might simply be replaced by just one good, ‘bad guy’.
See less