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  1. Posted: September 6, 2021In: Action

    When terrorists take his wife hostage in a tower at Christmas Eve, a NYPD detective must dispatch of them to set his wife free and reconcile with her.

    Gamling Penpusher
    Added an answer on September 7, 2021 at 12:06 am

    Well executed logline; starting with the "When", telling us about the main character and ending with the must. We do get two "goals" in this story at the end, but only one major hinder in the beginning (terrorists). Maybe one word that could describe our hero's status with his wife that helps us conRead more

    Well executed logline; starting with the “When”, telling us about the main character and ending with the must. We do get two “goals” in this story at the end, but only one major hinder in the beginning (terrorists). Maybe one word that could describe our hero’s status with his wife that helps us connect with the reconcile part of our hero’s goal. Maybe not necessary, but the only thing I could think of.

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  2. Posted: September 4, 2021In: Drama

    “After the murder of his secret lover, a closeted small-town lawyer struggling with addiction is forced to abandon the comforts of his old life to seek revenge.”

    anna_gotland Penpusher
    Added an answer on September 7, 2021 at 12:05 am

    I find this logline intriguing. I am curious about what "abandon the comforts of his old life" entails.

    I find this logline intriguing. I am curious about what “abandon the comforts of his old life” entails.

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  3. Posted: September 6, 2021In: Adventure

    When the love of his life is kidnapped by pirates because she carries a certain piece of gold, a smith teams up with a renowned pirate to rescue her.

    [Deleted User]
    Added an answer on September 7, 2021 at 12:04 am

    Good start. I feel like "because she carries a certain piece of gold" is not that necessary. Also I would put in some character trait for the smith. For example: "an honorable young smith".

    Good start. I feel like “because she carries a certain piece of gold” is not that necessary. Also I would put in some character trait for the smith. For example: “an honorable young smith”.

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