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  1. Posted: October 20, 2019In: Drama

    A timid young woman, a former recluse, gets her dream job at a prestigious real estate agency and must compete with its cutthroat male agents.

    thedarkhorse Samurai
    Added an answer on October 20, 2019 at 7:07 pm

    Okay. Thanks guys. I'll think about this. I don't mean to shoehorn an agenda or anything. I just imagined a shy, sweet, soft spoken (yet flawed) young woman surrounded by testosterone-filled alpha males/veterans of their trade. (Two Days, One Night meets Glengarry Glen Ross.) Her arc is from shy, swRead more

    Okay. Thanks guys. I’ll think about this.

    I don’t mean to shoehorn an agenda or anything. I just imagined a shy, sweet, soft spoken (yet flawed) young woman surrounded by testosterone-filled alpha males/veterans of their trade. (Two Days, One Night meets Glengarry Glen Ross.)

    Her arc is from shy, sweet, emotionally fragile to feisty, courageous, etc. She gets fired in the end for sticking to her beliefs and principles and being authentic. She loses and wins because she very much has become comfortable in the world and defeated a lot of demons.

    Her backstory: she married a fraudster who used and abused her, after a divorce she became a recluse and didn’t trust anyone. She was afraid of the world.

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  2. Posted: October 15, 2019In: SciFi

    Borrowed Time

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on October 20, 2019 at 12:38 pm

    Agreed with the above. This is interesting. The concept needs conflict, and simply avoiding the enforcers doesn't sound very enticing. More to the point, what is his goal? Keep avoiding them? Until when? What's the endpoint? What if he decides to actively stop the system of death? This way you put hRead more

    Agreed with the above. This is interesting.

    The concept needs conflict, and simply avoiding the enforcers doesn’t sound very enticing. More to the point, what is his goal? Keep avoiding them? Until when? What’s the endpoint?

    What if he decides to actively stop the system of death? This way you put him on a path to clash with the big scary folk.

    How about:
    After avoiding his demise in a world of predetermined deaths, a man must fight the system that dictates when people’s time is up.

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  3. Posted: October 18, 2019In: Drama

    (REVISION #8) When a na?ve, rambunctious teenager muscles in on her sister?s singing career in 1963?s England, her dream of stardom fizzles out as she succumbs to the excesses of a Rock?n Roll lifestyle, ends up pregnant, and after a botched illegal abortion, has to re-evaluate her life to halt her downward spiral.

    Neer Shelter Singularity
    Added an answer on October 20, 2019 at 12:16 pm

    This is a wordier version of the same logline posted several drafts ago. Seeing as much of the same story problems still exist, I recommend you study the comments you got to date and reevaluate this concept on a fundamental level.

    This is a wordier version of the same logline posted several drafts ago. Seeing as much of the same story problems still exist, I recommend you study the comments you got to date and reevaluate this concept on a fundamental level.

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