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When her mother dies, a shy, 13-year-old girl loses her faith in God and contemplates suicide when the grief overwhelms her.
Assuming her mother dies at the end of Act I, something more must happen, you cannot leave her contemplating for the remainder of the film. What else is going on in the story? What event or person prevents her from suicide? (Don't even think about letting the girl go through with it.)
Assuming her mother dies at the end of Act I, something more must happen, you cannot leave her contemplating for the remainder of the film. What else is going on in the story? What event or person prevents her from suicide? (Don’t even think about letting the girl go through with it.)
See lessAn alchemist loses faith in humanity and roams Earth while she breaks her people’s code, manipulating the atoms of sentient beings to interact with friends, torment others, and fight an evil of her own design.
What is the inciting incident that causes the alchemist to lose faith in humanity? If the evil is her own design, why must she fight against it? Does she decide for some reason to save humanity from an evil she created? Check out the Formula and the Generator? links at the top of the page to see whaRead more
What is the inciting incident that causes the alchemist to lose faith in humanity? If the evil is her own design, why must she fight against it? Does she decide for some reason to save humanity from an evil she created?
Check out the Formula and the Generator? links at the top of the page to see what information should be in a logline.
See lessThe whole country watches in horror and chaos ensues as all efforts seem to go in vain trying to rescue a little boy who falls into an abandoned deep tube well.
I like the concept, it reminds me of The Simpsons, though there is a lot of potential for actual drama. A lot of this logline can be shortened to make room for more pivotal information to entice the reader further. Instead of 'seem to go in vain' you could simply put 'fail in', and 'falls into an abRead more
I like the concept, it reminds me of The Simpsons, though there is a lot of potential for actual drama. A lot of this logline can be shortened to make room for more pivotal information to entice the reader further. Instead of ‘seem to go in vain’ you could simply put ‘fail in’, and ‘falls into an abandoned deep tube well’ could be ‘fell into an abandoned well’.
See less