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Rumours of the special school closure looming, fifteen year old student Toni must? decide and risk everything she knows and believes to feel she finally belongs in her world.
Hi Athena, Glad you took my advice and posted it here... Richiev and DPG both raised similar issues and solutions to what we discussed at the meetup, this should give you some good direction for further development.
Hi Athena,
Glad you took my advice and posted it here…
Richiev and DPG both raised similar issues and solutions to what we discussed at the meetup, this should give you some good direction for further development.
See lessA 38-year-old man, devout Catholic, and polio victim confined to an iron lung hires a sex surrogate so he can lose his virginity.
I would re write it so it reads as having more intent. For example: After his girlfriend rejects his marriage proposal, a devout Catholic polio victim confined to an iron lung, must hire a prostitute so he can lose his virginity.
I would re write it so it reads as having more intent. For example:
After his girlfriend rejects his marriage proposal, a devout Catholic polio victim confined to an iron lung, must hire a prostitute so he can lose his virginity.
See lessWhen a troubled hospice nurse accepts a new job caring for a mysterious couple?s granddaughter on their rural plantation, she must protect her young patient from a violent attacker bent on revenge.
Actually,? I think? "on her rural plantation"? can be cut.? The particular setting is extraneous to the logline. What isn't extraneous and needs more particularity is what constitutes the "evil intentions".? There are so many? ways people can behave with "evil intentions" -- which one applies to thiRead more
Actually,? I think? “on her rural plantation”? can be cut.? The particular setting is extraneous to the logline.
What isn’t extraneous and needs more particularity is what constitutes the “evil intentions”.? There are so many? ways people can behave with “evil intentions” — which one applies to this story?? Is she going to be offered up in a ritual sacrifice?? And isn’t the initial attack, the inciting incident,? a kidnapping?? If so,? that is how the incident should be described.
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