A former high school jock is thrust into duty to save his high school reunion after a prank turns his classmates into the living dead.
Brandon8719Logliner
A former high school jock is thrust into duty to save his high school reunion after a prank turns his classmates into the living dead.
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By doing what? The goal (and action the protagonist takes to achieve it) needs to be clear to the audience. “Save his school” is not specific enough, because it could take almost infinite forms.
It will also provide the hook that separates this from the horde of other zombie/living dead films out there. Right now, all I know about your film is that it’s a zombie movie in a high school.
So zombies in high school…
Agreed with Nicholas, what about this will stand out and make a producer want to read the script? What’s the twist/hook?
Not really much to add to the above except wondering how a prank could turn the students into living dead, unless this is false, and a total setup, in which I think you should explain that motive and why it needs to succeed.
I do see how it is not very specific. I also see where the issue is as their is nothing driving the story.
I was throwing things around and came up with an idea. I had in mind that the Jock is one of those guys who was the BMOC
Now he is overweight out of shape and works at a shoe store for min wage. Meanwhile his Former High School Gf is living a lavish lifestyle.
He still pines for her and this is his chance to prove that he is not that loser after high school.
So he now has to go back into that hero mode to save her from the horde.
Just a very very very rough outline of what i was thinking.
What actor is gonna jump at the chance to play the guy you just described? I bet not many.
I was thinking a Seth Rogen type. The comedy kind of writes itself. You could even add possibly turn it into a buddy comedy as well.
Two guys go back to their reuinion and end up battling the horde.
Well … the rescue of the ex-girlfriend seems pretty central to the idea?
“After a viral outbreak turns the attendees of a 10 year reunion into ravenous zombies, a down-on-his-luck ex-jock turned shoe-salesman battles?the living dead to rescue?a group of survivors (and his high-school sweetheart) trapped in?the gym.”
Maybe a LITTLE wordy, but I think clearer and provides more of the hook — or at least hints at the themes of redemption and reclaiming former glory?
Substitute ‘viral outbreak’ for ‘chemical explosion’ or ‘miscast spell’, whatever happens. I think ‘prank’ calls for specificity, and weighs down the logline in the wrong place (because the reader is curious about the nature of the prank). I’d suggest keeping that bit a little vaguer (leave it for the script – just describe the outcome of the prank) and get the logline to the meat and potatoes of the story quicker.
With a little more information, I’m more interested in the story, for sure, and can see?the script’s potential. (Who are the survivors? Did they not drink the tainted punch that turned everyone into zombies because they’re the members of his AA group, or worse … the nerds he used to pick on? Maybe he busted his knee and couldn’t play?basketball anymore – a cliche, I know – but dragging the ex-jock to the part of the school that resulted in the current trajectory of his life is a great way to build ‘the cave’ in the second act).
As for ‘who would want to play this part’ – in a story of arrested development and the quest for former glory, I can see tons of actors who’d go for that. My first thought was Chris Pratt (but fat Chris Pratt from Parks & Rec).
Anyway … good luck with the logline and/or script.