A group of AP students must explore the balance between studying and partying in order to better understand the high school experience.
kyaabrogdonLogliner
A group of AP students must explore the balance between studying and partying in order to better understand the high school experience.
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>>??must explore the balance,,,??in order to better understand
That pertains to the subjective story, what they need to learn? –? but initially don’t realize they need to learn.? (And in drama, characters never start out? knowing what they really need to learn. )? But loglines are not about subjective story.? Loglines are about the objective story? and that is about the pursuit of a concrete (ergo, visual) goal or destination.
The subjective story line is about what they unintentionally learn in the process of intentionally pursuing the objective goal.
Where is the conflict, this sounds like a normal college experience.
Also, you haven’t given the reader a lead character.
How about something like this, which has a lead character and conflict.
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“When he is accepted as an AP student a bullied teen vows to live out the normal college life, balancing partying and studying, but things go awry when he catches the ire of a fraternity and he must fight back or relive his high school nightmare.”??
A logline needs four things: protagonist, antagonist, conflict, stakes. You’ve specified none of them. Who are they? Why must they do what they’re doing? What are they doing? What actually happens? And what does AP mean? Also: never start a logline with “When…” Start with the protagonist, define the other three elements. Use 25-30 words and no punctuation. Leave nothing unclear.