Logliner
Posted: 2018-04-04T01:00:22+10:00 In:

A loyal husband and his wife have a double date with their two best friends. All goes well until the husband’s strong romantic feelings for his best friends’ girlfriend, who happens to be his ex, show up in the middle of the date. TITLE: Double Trouble

A loyal husband and his wife have a double date with their two best friends. All goes well until the husband’s strong romantic feelings for his best friends’ girlfriend, who happens to be his ex, show up in the middle of the date. TITLE: Double Trouble
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    2 Reviews

    1. Best Answer
      Uberwriter

      >>>A loyal husband and his wife

      If he’s “loyal”, he cannot have “strong romantic feelings” in the middle of their double date.

      Also, what happens as a result of this inciting incident?
      You need a goal for your protagonist–which reminds me–who is your protagonist?

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    2. Best Answer
      Uberwriter

      “When his feelings for an ex resurfaces on a double date…”

      Still why would anybody double date their Ex if their history had the potential of resurfacing?

      “After being forced by his wife to double date an Ex, his feelings for her reappear…”

      But you risk a passive protagonist with this version, since he is dragged in Act II by his wife

      I get a feeling that you kinda get the logline formula..
      I’d suggest you post more loglines to see how it goes
      Don’t go missing mrmmr

      If you don’t believe me, read the crappy loglines most logliners posted in the beginning of their journey here
      While yours was a decent enough try..

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