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Swede
Posted: December 13, 20122012-12-13T13:00:57+10:00 2012-12-13T13:00:57+10:00In: Public

A scientist builds a satellite system that ends World War III; then must find a way to disable it to prevent another holocaust in the battle of Armageddon.

Judgment at Armageddon

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    3 Reviews

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    1. karlosd
      2012-10-19T03:22:31+10:00Added an answer on October 19, 2012 at 3:22 am

      Hey Swede,

      My issue here is the disconnect between a system that shuts down wars, and the idea of Armageddon: I don’t know if you mean the real Biblical Armageddon (which is implied by the phrase ‘battle of’), or WW4 (and why didn’t the scientist include an ‘off’ switch 🙂

      I quite like the idea of it being the literal Armageddon – otherwise you have to wonder why what worked for WW3, won’t work again for WW4. So with that said, here’s my reworked version:

      “A self aware satellite forces the end of World War III, but the scientist who designed it realizes he must find a way to shut the system down before it triggers the prophecies of the End Times.”

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    2. debbiemoon Penpusher
      2012-12-13T19:14:45+10:00Added an answer on December 13, 2012 at 7:14 pm

      Leaving aside any theological issues (I’m reasonably sure no one would be able to stop Armageddon, but let’s face it, that’s never stopped Hollywood before!)… This is a pretty decent logline. The only problem is that the reader’s first instinct is to think “How could a computer system cause a Biblical event?” so I think you need to find a way of hinting at that in the logline, preferably without making it much longer…

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    3. 2012-12-14T17:59:34+10:00Added an answer on December 14, 2012 at 5:59 pm

      This logline is a bit confused and circular as it currently stands. A satellite system prevents WWIII yet needs to be disabled during some later world war? The why and the how is left too unsaid. Greater clarity is needed to prevent a reader from scratching their head and just moving on.

      Here’s an example of greater clarity: “A new orbital guardian system is equiped with artificial intelligence that can swiftly cut short any explosive war. When the machine intelligence calculates that a small population is an acceptable loss, its inventor must turn against it.”

      Steven Fernandez (Judge)

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