Penpusher
Posted: 2017-03-29T07:15:11+10:00 In:

A troubled prison psychologist stops at nothing to discover the true identity of her sister?s killer.

A troubled prison psychologist stops at nothing to discover the true identity of her sister?s killer.
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    3 Reviews

    1. Uberwriter

      “A troubled prison psychologist stops at nothing to discover the true identity of her sister?s killer.”

      What is the inciting incident? What is the event that causes her to undergo this investigation? And is the killer inside her prison, a prisoner and she finds out which one? If not then the description is unnecessary. “Stops at nothing” is vague. What exactly does she do? Why does it have to be her? Why not the police or a PI?

      Example:?When a prison psychologist is anonymously informed that one of her patients murdered her sister, she must investigate them to figure out who the killer is. (26)

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    2. Singularity

      Good alternative by Dkpough1. ?The logline needs to be more specific on the points he raised.

      And what does “troubled” mean? ?That she’s grief stricken or afflicted with a mental disorder herself?

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    3. Penpusher

      Thanks for the help!

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