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alejobPenpusher
Posted: February 21, 20202020-02-21T12:43:46+10:00 2020-02-21T12:43:46+10:00In: Student Loglines

When the city is devoured by war. A surviving girl on the verge of madness and a hungry old rat cross their lonely paths in order to find their salvation.

When the city is devoured by war. A surviving girl on the verge of madness and a hungry old rat cross their lonely paths in order to find their salvation.
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    3 Reviews

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    1. Best Answer
      Tony Byrd Penpusher
      2020-02-21T12:59:00+10:00Added an answer on February 21, 2020 at 12:59 pm

      I love it. It reminds me of I Am Legend.

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    2. Best Answer
      Karel Segers Samurai
      2020-02-21T15:42:22+10:00Added an answer on February 21, 2020 at 3:42 pm

      The problem with a logline like this is that I can’t see the promise of interesting, unique scenes.

      We have seen many dystopian, post-apocalyptical films about single characters fighting to survive a cruel environment.
      What makes this one unique and interesting to watch?

      If the girl is on the verge of madness, it will be hard for an audience to identify with her. So what DOES make us care for her?
      It could be her relationship to the rat. But then – unless the movie is animated – the rat has limited potential to become a real character, that the girl can bounce off.

      You could give a little more detail about the war. Is it a real war from the past, or fictitious? Save on words by leaving out ‘surviving’.

      Finally, what does ‘to find their salvation’ mean? It’s a generic theme phrase that doesn’t add much in terms of appeal, or even detail.

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    3. Best Answer
      Richiev Singularity
      2020-02-22T13:39:22+10:00Added an answer on February 22, 2020 at 1:39 pm

      What does salvation look like on the screen?

      If it’s to escape the city, then you should say, “escape the city”

      If it’s to find food for her loved ones who are starving, then you should say that.

      Because, if you say the lead character’s goal is to find salvation, then you should tell us what salvation means to the lead character.

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