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LeviathanSamurai
Posted: March 10, 20182018-03-10T06:27:28+10:00 2018-03-10T06:27:28+10:00In: Thriller

After a well planned ambush on an armored truck carrying arms, a cop must find the people behind it before the weapons hit the streets.

After a well planned ambush on an armored truck carrying arms, a cop must find the people behind it before the weapons hit the streets.
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    5 Reviews

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    1. Knightrider Mentor
      2018-03-10T07:08:28+10:00Added an answer on March 10, 2018 at 7:08 am

      The elements are there: Armoured car carrying weapons is stolen, and this cop most track them down before they are sold and hit the streets.

      I guess for me it is why this cop? Why out of the thousands of police does he have to do it. Was he driving the trick, was he tricked by a partner what is his motivation beyond duty.

      Hope that helps.

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    2. Knightrider Mentor
      2018-03-10T07:10:22+10:00Added an answer on March 10, 2018 at 7:10 am

      Sorry, one more thing ‘hit the streets’ might seem a little vague. Maybe he needs to find the underground auction where they will be sold as what reason is therd for the guns to not hit the streets instantly?

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    3. CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2018-03-10T09:41:26+10:00Added an answer on March 10, 2018 at 9:41 am

      This is a good solid base for a story. But why this crime and this cop. In Heat Robert De Niro breaks his own rule and forms a connection to someone.

      It?s a cop story that is really about two men that are having relationships issues because of their involvement in crime.

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    4. Richiev Singularity
      2018-03-10T15:13:14+10:00Added an answer on March 10, 2018 at 3:13 pm

      While the premise is good, I think you may need that one extra element to hook the idea with the reader
      ————————————————————
      “When MS-13 steals a huge arms shipment, a mercurial police translator is teamed with a hard-nosed?detective to find the shipment before the guns hit the streets.”

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    5. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2018-03-11T12:50:38+10:00Added an answer on March 11, 2018 at 12:50 pm

      Agreed with the above – this reads like a standard police procedural episode. Ultimately, it’s about a guy doing his job but what you need is for it to be about a motivated guy doing something out of the ordinary. Could his brother or sister be involved in a gang and he knows that the weapons were taken by a rival gang?

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