After discovering he is not the sole orphaned victim of an inhuman creature that took his parents years ago, a college student must piece together how the orphans are connected before the creature strikes again.
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After discovering he is not the sole orphaned victim of an inhuman creature that took his parents years ago, a college student must piece together how the orphans are connected before the creature strikes again.
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“After discovering he is not the sole orphaned victim of an inhuman creature that took his parents years ago, a college student must piece together how they are connected before the creature strikes again.”
The inciting incident should be reworded, more specific. How does this event motivate the protagonist to pursue the goal? The rest of the logline is a bit confusing. Piece together how what is connected?
by nature a creature (In this context) is not human, so ?you don’t need to tell us creature is inhuman.
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“Orphaned as a kid, a college student teams with several other orphan victims to hunt down the creature?that killed their parents and destroy it.”
Not sure what the story is from the logline.
What specific event motivates the orphan to find out the truth? You describe it as if his discovery that there are more like him motivated him but I’m not sure how or why? Could something else have happned that would be a powerfull motivating event? Also, it reads as if he wants to kill the creature (“…before the creature strikes again.”) best to specify this. If that’s not the case, how will he make sure it doesn’t strike again?