An inconvenienced Army Private tracks his runaway sister into the underworld of the Atlanta sex industry with the reluctant help of a young prostitute named Snow White, but can he save either girl before their time on the streets runs out?

Feels long. I could be wrong on the length. My advice Might make it longer though so prepare :D.

Army private doesn’t seem that interesting, soldier is more commanding and also one word. I feel like the prostitute named snow white is the strongest and most interesting point lead with it.

“With the reluctant help of Snow white the prostitute, an inconvenienced soldier tracks his runaway sister through the dangerous underworld of Atlanta’s sex industry, with both girls in on the streets and time running out can he save them both?

As i wrote that another thing that stuck out to me was the “Atlanta sex industry.” I think you may have already established the environment by leading with Snow white the prostitute. So that extra description feels like clutter. Cut sex industry out.

“With the reluctant help of Snow White the prostitute, an inconvenienced soldier tracks his runaway sister through the dangerous underworld of Atlanta. With both girls in on the streets and time running out can he save them both?

Personally starting out with “with” on both sentence leave a crappy taste in my mouth, but this is feedback! Take what I said and make it way better!

You don’t have to start with Snow White but play on the irony of her innocent sounding name in the logline and you will capture a lot more attention i think.