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Jackalboy11Logliner
Posted: September 20, 20172017-09-20T08:55:05+10:00 2017-09-20T08:55:05+10:00In: Comedy

Buddy Comedy: ONE BAD APPLE A LAPD COP?S new partner is a PSYCHIC; just as her powers make incredible busts she gets fired when she fingers the POLICE CHIEF.

Buddy Comedy: ONE BAD APPLE A LAPD COP?S new partner is a PSYCHIC; just as her powers make incredible busts she gets fired when she fingers the POLICE CHIEF.
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    1. dpg Singularity
      2017-09-22T08:24:26+10:00Added an answer on September 22, 2017 at 8:24 am

      And then what happens? ?What is the plot that results?

      The logline sets up a situation and inciting incident for a plot, but doesn’t follow through with laying out a complete plot. ?Nor is it clear who the protagonist is.

      Who is the protagonist? Who is in the drivers’s seat of the story — the LAPD cop or his psychic partner? ?If the latter, then the logline should be framed leading off with her — not him.

      And what become the objective goal of the designated protagonist as a result of fingering the chief of police? ?What is the story about?

      (Also, loglines shouldn’t include the title, the genre. Those are entered in separate fields. ?And DON”T USE ALL CAPS.

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