Forced out of a cloistered life after his employer dies, an illiterate simpleton gardener becomes a media celebrity and Washington influencer after a dying billionaire mistakes his gardening advice as metaphorical words of economic wisdom.

I would like to remark on the strategy I used to arrive at the version I posted.

The general rule is that a logline should be no longer than 25 words in length.? But, of course, there are always exceptions, outliers.? Loglines that require more than 30 words are a particular challenge. (Loglines that exceed 40 words are a problem? –? a fatal flaw. A logline longer than 40 words is DOA — dead on arrival.)

So the question is: how best to craft a logline for scripts and story ideas that are longer?? My answer is:? deliver the story hook within the first 25 words.

The story hook? for “Being There” is how a simpleton gardener becomes a media celebrity and Washington influencer.? My first rough drafts for a logline followed the sequence of events.? And so:

His employer’s death forces a illiterate simpleton out of his cloistered life into the world where a politically powerful but dying billionaire mistakes him as a sage economist transforming him into a celebrity and influential Washington player.

Well, at 37 words it stays under the 40 word ceiling and, less or more, conveys what the story is about.? But it contains a serious flaw:? the reader has to slog through 28 words to find out what the story hook is.? (And I am rabid on the point that the story hook is the most important element in a logline.) So I reworked the logline? until I could plant the story hook before the 25th word , that is,? state it within the generally accepted maximum logline length.

In the version posted, the story hook is inserted before word 22.? I violated the letter of the “law” with a 35 word logline, but observed the “spirit” by getting the story hook within the 1st 25 words.

Mission accomplished.

fwiw