Logliner
Posted: 2015-10-14T07:03:14+10:00 In:

Four thirty-something guys deal with different stages of fatherhood, whilst working out along the way that they have barely grown up themselves.

Four thirty-something guys deal with different stages of fatherhood, whilst working out along the way that they have barely grown up themselves.
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    2 Reviews

    1. Logliner

      Hi!

      What you have written sounds like an intresting concept, but I don’t get any idea of what’s going to happen in the movie. What will I get to see except a bunch of guys walking around, thinking of life?

      Is there a main character or are all four of them main characters? (I would personally prefer if one guy got the main part and the other were there as his friends).

      What goal do the main character(s) have? And what must he (they) do reach that?

      What is the inciting incident that gets the whole story started?

      Figure these things out and include them in the logline.

      Hope this helped 🙂

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    2. Singularity

      >>>All four are main characters

      So it seems to be?a “buddy film”, an ensemble story where the characters lives revolve around the theme of fatherhood.??Okay, but?as written this logline is a statement of a ?concept rather than a plot.? And loglines are about plots.? A plot gives an indication of where?the?story is going to go with the concept.

      So??four guys are?about to become fathers.?Then what happens?? ?What dramatic need arises as a result?that requires an objective goal to resolve? What’s the character flaw that may make them fail to rise to the demands of the role of being fathers?? What’s the hook in this concept that differentiates it from other stories about fatherhood?

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