In an Anthromorphic world, a diverse team of athletes competes in the futuristic sports called Hypersports in which species compete against each other for the title of king of beast. However our team, are the first ever-diverse team, believing it would make them a stronger force. This however is underpinned with internal cultural differences leading to internal conflict and external conflict. They need learn to put away their differences in order to stand up for there believes and win the title.
willymelvin22Logliner
In an Anthromorphic world, a diverse team of athletes competes in the futuristic sports called Hypersports in which species compete against each other for the title of king of beast. However our team, are the first ever-diverse team, believing it would make them a stronger force. This however is underpinned with internal cultural differences leading to internal conflict and external conflict. They need learn to put away their differences in order to stand up for there believes and win the title.
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At 81 words, this is way too long to be a logline.? It’s more like a? story pitch.
Please study the guidelines under “Our formula” at the top of the page for guidelines on writing an industry acceptable logline.
Who is the lead character?
What do they want?
What is standing in their way?
>>> could be about 85 words.
???
FWIW: I?ve never read a logline longer than 40 words. And I?ve studied over a 1,000.? A long logline defeats the whole purpose of a logline, which is to succinctly state what the script is about to busy, multi-tasking movie makers suffering from industry induced ADD, attention deficit disorder.? Their attention span is measured in seconds, not minutes.