?Bluff? is centred around a wacky, headline grabbing, narrative twisting, family-owned company called Eclipse; the source of each and every media storm in NY that?ll ironically steer Billie in her journey of uncovering who she is via the definition of truth.
Demetri.Penpusher
In her journey for truth, Billie Malone rebuffs the family trait of entitlement and privilege by getting a job at the very same media company that sees the family name above the door: entitled she is not.
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Not only is it unclear what the story is – because you haven’t told us much about what actually happens – it’s unclear what this logline is even supposed to mean. If she isn’t entitled, why is she working at her family’s company? Wouldn’t she work her way up somewhere else, without trading on her name?
Give us the basics: protagonist, antagonist, conflict, stakes. If you’re not sure what those are, your script may not be fully developed.
What is the cause? Everything is normal then suddenly, at this time she goes on her journey for truth.
Why now? What happened?
One more thing, you might want to say she ‘secretly’ gets a job at her family’s media company, because being the ‘owners daughter’ is the epitome?of entitled.
(But if she secretly gets an entry-level job at the company, then there is no special treatment)
1. that sees ‘her’ family name above the door? just a suggestion.
I’m afraid I’m going to have to agree with the others. I’m really unsure what the story is about – she’s trying to find herself – that’s the goal – so she joins her family business… instead of breaking free from the bubble. Unless she’s employed secretly, as Richiev suggested, she is always going to be a Malone. Even if she’s employed secretly how is this going to help her find herself?
You said “sees the family name above the door”. The family name is Malone. The company name is Eclipse. The company name should be Malone Media. Or am I missing something?
You don’t need to include names in the logline. It takes up valuable real estate and adds nothing.
As a goal “truth” is vague at best. I’m ignoring your additional comments and focussing solely on the logline. If she’s searching for herself say that in the logline. ‘Truth’ needs context to be an appropriate goal but even then there’s possibly a better alternative that gives the reader a much clearer idea what her purpose is. A detective can search for the truth amidst the evidence… but he could just search for the killer.
In my experience, when a character deliberately sets out to find themselves they don’t until they get back to where they started. A lot of characters find themselves as a by-product of doing something else. How is she going to find herself in this setting? How will it work visually? Film is a visual medium and the logline should explain what’s going to happen in a visual way.
What’s the inciting incident that sets this story in motion? This is usually something that upsets the balance in the protagonist’s life and their goal is to correct the balance. For example: Billie could be cut off financially by her parents as they want to end the family trait of entitlement and privilege.
Please, simplify. Not only will it help us understand what you want to say, but -most importantly- it will help you figure out your idea’s flaws.
And what is “the definition of truth”.? The truth about what?? ?Film is a visual medium:? what does the “definition of truth” look like?
“After a? near-death experience, a rich party girl secretly gets an entry level job at her family’s media company while searching for answers to the meaning of life.”