Possessed by an angel, a reclusive student is forced to track down the host of an escaped demon and exorcise it before he becomes its next victim.
inanimateobjectPenpusher
Possessed by an angel, a reclusive student is forced to track down the host of an escaped demon and exorcise it before he becomes its next victim.
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Hello, I like it!
I just feel a little contractidiction between track down the demon and becoming his victim… ?I suggest to cut the “before he becomes his next?victim”.
I’m not fully confortable with the “forced by an angel” – who is your main character, the reclusive student or the angel? If your main character is the student i wouldn’t use the word forced or you’ll have a passive character. If the student is just a flesh vehicle for the angel, then write the logline with the angel as a main character. ?Or, the angel and the student share the same body, and this could generate conflict maybe but mostly confusion (how do you show, visually, this struggle between the student and the angel)? Remember of the fail of “the host” by Niccol, where an alien mind and a human mind share the same body.
Good luck!
It sounds like the MC is the angel and the logline should be told form his or her point of view. The angel can still take control of the students body but the story is the angel’s not the student’s.
What is the big danger posed by the demon outside of the that to the person he or she is possessing? Is there a greater good the angel is fighting for than one human? Could the demon be trying to bring about the Apocalypse for example?
I think the stakes need raising significantly and an inciting incident needs to be specified.
Hope this helps.