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Paul ClarkeSamurai
Posted: October 31, 20172017-10-31T10:01:59+10:00 2017-10-31T10:01:59+10:00In: Comedy

When a criminal investigation threatens her wealthy estate, a selfish woman places it in a charitable foundation run by her na?ve, unhinged colleague and attempts to maintain control without her knowledge. (Sitcom)

When a criminal investigation threatens her wealthy estate, a selfish woman places it in a charitable foundation run by her na?ve, unhinged colleague and attempts to maintain control without her knowledge. (Sitcom)
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    1. Foxtrot25 Uberwriter
      2017-10-31T16:37:06+10:00Added an answer on October 31, 2017 at 4:37 pm

      Paul,

      Confused about this. She places the entire estate, not just cash into a charitable foundation? If she is the protagonist and also a criminal, why would we want to root for her to maintain control?

      Is the charity friend the Protagonist? If so, you need to rewrite this to reflect that.

      Otherwise, sounds like a fresh story with potential.

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    2. pedrots Penpusher
      2017-10-31T23:51:05+10:00Added an answer on October 31, 2017 at 11:51 pm

      Confused. She transferred her complete estate to the foundation? That’d make little sense financially wise.

      Also her COLLEAGUE runs the foundation? wouldn’t it be her EMPLOYEE then? assuming?the protag?chairs the Foundation Board.

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    3. Foxtrot25 Uberwriter
      2017-11-01T00:52:04+10:00Added an answer on November 1, 2017 at 12:52 am

      I also assume that the authorities are working to become wise to her and pursue them both? One thing about Government, they are good at following?the trail of money.

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