Logliner
Posted: 2016-04-10T23:25:25+10:00 In:

When a teenager is kicked out of home after being discovered at a gay sauna, he escapes to L.A. determined to become a famous porn star but when his lover dies from a drug overdose he embarks upon a journey of recovery that leads him to Bali where he finds the only chance he has left to save his life.

When a teenager is kicked out of home after being discovered at a gay sauna, he escapes to L.A. determined to become a famous porn star but when his lover dies from a drug overdose he embarks upon a journey of recovery that leads him to Bali where he finds the only chance he has left to save his life.
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    1. Singularity

      A logline is a sales tool.? A good logline sells the sizzle?in a story — not the entire steak.

      Let’s be blunt:? the sizzle in your story, the element that?is likely to grab attention, make someone want to read your script, is the?character’s?aspiration to become a gay porn star.??? Sex sells; recovery — not so much.

      Your logline?sets up the expectation that the 2nd Act will be about his struggles to make it?as a porn star.? And then the rest of your logline completely ignores that story element. It shifts focus to?other story threads?not directly related to the sizzle:? his lover dies of an overdose and he takes a journey of recovery.

      What about his struggle to?become a porn star? If your character’s dream is to make it as a porn star, then that raises the dramatic question that should frame the entire 2nd Act (at least):? will his efforts to become a porn star succeed?

      This further raises the expectation that the 2nd Act will be about his mal-adventures in the gay sex industry.? Complications ensue, of course, the usual wretched excesses and abuse.?

      Further,?a logline should raise that question (implicitly) — but it should not?answer it.? This logline, however, gives away the answer to ?the dramatic question ( “No, he fails .”)

      And a logline should further describe one and only one story line or plot for the main character.? But yours has two:? 1] Going to L.A. to become a porn star; 2] A journey of recovery to Bali.?? Pick one story line for your logline ?and focus on that only.? Either he’s on a? journey to become a porn star or he’s on a? journey to recovery.?

      (There are techniques for melding both into one story line, one plot in the script itself, but that’s beyond the scope of this web?site which is devoted to writing loglines?for?scripts.)

      Anyway, my takeaway for writing a logline is:??frame and focus on one and only one story line, one plot.?

      fwiw

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