Logliner
Posted: 2017-05-21T13:42:23+10:00 In:

When his son dies, a distraught and vengeful dad must accept that the death was an accident and not a murder.

When his son dies, a distraught and vengeful dad must accept that the death was an accident and not a murder.
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    3 Reviews

    1. Singularity

      Loglines are descriptions of plots which are efforts to achieve objective goals, not resolve subjective problems like coming to accept an accidental death of a loved one.

      In the script ?achieving the objective goal often hinges on resolving the subjective problem. But, to repeat, a logline should not focus on resolving the subjective problem in order to achieve the objective goal. ?A logline should focus on the effort to achieve the objective goal.

      Ergo, the resolution of the subjective problem is only dramatically relevant in the context of the struggle for an objective goal.

      And descriptions of plots in a logline should be face forward in time — not backward.

      (A good movie you might want to view and study in terms of the emotional issue you seem to be interested in — coming to terms with an accidental death — is ?”Ordinary People”.)

      fwiw

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    2. Singularity

      Agreed with DPG.

      Ciaran,
      Welcome aboard.

      Please read the ‘Formula’ tab up top for more information about logline conventions.

      Also, please read the ‘Rules’ section. I moderated your posts by deleting the loglines that had the least number of comments from other users. Please refrain from blanket covering the first few pages with your concepts and stick to the community guideline of 2 reviews for each logline you post. This way other people can benefit from your thoughts on their loglines and have the opportunity to have their loglines in the top spots of the first few pages.

      Nir.

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    3. Singularity

      >>>>must accept that the death was an accident and not a murder.

      Seems to be a spoiler giving away the solution to the mystery: ?was it an accident or a crime covered up to appear as an accident? ?And a logline should never contain a spoiler, give away the Big Reveal or the ending.

      The logline needs to be framed in terms of the father’s initial (end of Act 1) objective goal, not his final (Act 3) realization.

      And btw: ?the best plots are torture racks designed to make the protagonist suffer, to force them into confessing a ?secret truth about themselves. ?Ergo, in struggling to discover the truth about his son’s death (objective goal), the father should be forced to realize and confess an unpleasant truth about himself (subjective need).

      Again, “Ordinary People” is a model movie of a family on the torture rack after the accidental death of a beloved family member.

      fwiw

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