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Thank you Jean-Marie. The hero IS a young mother, so that works.
Funnily this script, is far less developed than the other I have posted a logline for- but it seems to feel tighter.
Partly, I am trying decide which to focus on right now.
Hi sarapensalfini,
Seems to be good.
I see a Hero, her flaw, her quest, her antagonist, the conflict, what's at stakes... the whole story in 31 words.
I don't see what could improve your logline except something that increase empathy for your hero (maybe replace "dancer" by "young mother", or something like that...).
I saw two good movies close to the genre : "Coma" and "Extreme mesures". In these two movies, the hero was a doctor. I think that the fact the hero is a patient is a bonus because it increases the stakes and it makes the quest harder.
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